Planning a Party? Involve the Guest of Honor
Several years ago, my cousins planned a party to celebrate their parents 50th wedding anniversary. They did an excellent job, the party went as planned, and a good time was had by all. My aunt and uncle were overjoyed at the event.
Some months later, my aunt made an off-hand comment that she was very grateful for their efforts, but she wished she could have been involved in the party planning. There were some people whom she regretted were not at the event, but they were not on the guest list.
Getting the guest of honor involved in the party planning means that their wishes will taken into consideration. And they may have wishes that differ from what you may expect–even if they are close family.
Getting the guest of honor involved is important even if he or she is a child. It gives them a sense of ownership over the party, not to mention another pair of hands to help with preparation. They are likely to have preferences about the theme, the decoration, activities and party entertainment, not to mention the guest list.
Clearly the extent and the manner of involvement will differ according to the child’s age; a teenager will have greater input than a toddler. But both can contribute.
Nonetheless, if you are the party planner, especially if you are the parent of the guest of honor, you do have final say.
Paula Says:
This is wonderful advice, Ellen. I am sure that including the guest of honor will usually enhance everyone’s experience. On the other hand, I imagine that party planners have all sorts of cautionary tales about what can happen when the guest of honor is NOT involved. (Maybe that’s grist for an entirely different blog post!) ;>)
Posted on December 10th, 2009 at 7:05 pm
Kathryn Merrow - The Pain Relief Coach Says:
This is a great idea to prevent misunderstandings, hurt feelings, and missed expectations or desires. Thanks for sharing!
Posted on December 11th, 2009 at 4:23 pm
Deb Says:
This is great advice. I’m wondering how you would handle this for a surprise party. We had a party a while back for a friend’s birthday, and since it was a surprise party, didn’t check with her first. We missed inviting some friends from her work that she would have loved to have at the party. I’d hate to repeat that mistake!
Deb
Posted on December 19th, 2009 at 1:40 pm
Ellen Zucker Says:
Deb, that’s always a dicey situation. If you are determined to keep the party a surprise, you can only do the best that you can and there are no guarantees.
One solution is to involve people from as many areas of the Guest of Honor’s life as possible. Find out where the GOH spends her time and then contact friends from those areas such as her job, organizations in which she volunteers, etc.
Thanks for asking.
Posted on December 20th, 2009 at 9:22 pm